Dog lovers consider big, mournful puppy eyes gazing at them to be heartwarming. Those soulful glances melt human hearts. But could those mournful eyes indicate that the dog is actually mourning?
It is difficult to assess what those mournful eyes mean because our canine friends cannot tell us what they are feeling. Even though dogs do not verbalize that they are happy or sad, astute pet owners interpret their pets’ emotions based on behavior. With these interpretations in mind, it is commonly acknowledged that dogs do feel happiness, sadness, fear and possessiveness. They also get angry and nervous. And they do indeed mourn.
When a dog loses a companion, two- or four-legged, he grieves and reacts to the changes in his life. Dogs alter their behavior when they mourn, much like people do:
Pet owners recognize these changes in daily behavior as the same signs of grieving that humans exhibit. The common denominator in human or canine grief, is the loss of a central individual (canine or human) along with the associated bond.
Skeptics suggest that dogs do not really grieve and attribute their behavioral changes to the alterations in daily routine resulting from the absence of an integral figure in a dog’s life. In other words, the dog is “upset” because his schedule is off. With the loss of a companion dog, perhaps the surviving dog misses canine interaction and play time. With the loss of a human companion, perhaps feeding and walking schedules are changed as the new caregiver takes charge. Since they may not actually understand death as something permanent, sometimes a dog will wait patiently, believing that the deceased caregiver will return. Others believe that the dog may just be reacting to the grief exhibited by humans in the house as they deal with the death of a household member.
A recent study concluded that common signs associated with mourning are:
The study, which assessed many different behavior patterns, concluded that 66% of dogs experienced four or more behavioral changes after the loss of a family pet which indicated grief.
When signs of grief become evident following the loss of an animal or human family member, concerned owners can help their dogs deal with grief:
Spend extra time with your dog. Try to divert your dog’s attention by engaging in her favorite pastimes. Go for a walk. Play a game of fetch. Take a ride in the car.
Be more affectionate. Make a point of petting your dog more often. Make eye contact and talk to him by verbalizing routine household activities, “OK, Scout, let’s load the dishwasher.” 3. If your dog enjoys company, invite friends over who will interact with your dog. A little human variety can pique your dog’s interest.
Provide entertainment while you are gone. Hide treats in popular (to your dog) household locations for him to find during the day or fill a foraging toy with food to keep him busy while you are gone.
Reinforce good behavior and ignore inappropriate behavior. Some mournful dogs vocalize or howl without provocation. Although it is hard to do, try to ignore this behavior. Resist the temptation to give your dog a treat to quiet him, which will only reinforce the behavior you want to change. Firmly tell him to hush and reward him if he complies. The reward does not have to be food….a hug will suffice. You may also try to break the howling cycle by distracting your dog. Instead of approaching him, which may be interpreted as positive reinforcement of the undesirable behavior, try calling him to you. If he heeds your command, praise him and initiate a distraction with a walk, or a game.
Consider medical therapy. If your dog has prolonged difficulty following a loss, ask your veterinarian about the use of a behavior modification drug. There are several medications that can serve as adjunct therapy and may enhance your efforts at resolving behavior issues associated with mourning. Your pet’s doctor may want to do blood and urine tests prior to prescribing medication to rule out systemic problems that could affect behavior, such as thyroid problems, diabetes, or electrolyte imbalances, to name a few.
Think carefully about replacing a lost pet. If your dog’s grief is due to the loss of a canine companion, don’t rush to find a replacement. Give your dog time to grieve and adjust to the loss. Introduction of a new dog may add more stress to an already stressful situation.
Establishing a new, comfortable social structure in the home following the loss of a human or canine family member is important for the entire family, but even more so, for dogs. People have lives that extend outside the immediate family unit to help distract them from grief or place the loss in a broader perspective. They have friends at work, see people at the gym, and communicate with distant friends and relatives, electronically.
“When a member of that family unit is gone, there is a huge void in the dog’s life and he may need help in dealing with loss.”
Dogs have a much narrower social structure with set boundaries that extend only as far as the inside of the house, or the perimeter of the yard, or the walking path around the neighborhood. Their days are focused on a much smaller social periphery that may include only the other pets and people within the immediate family unit. When a member of that family unit is gone, there is a huge void in the dog’s life and they may need help in dealing with loss.
Time will also contribute to the healing process of both pet and pet owner. Loss will become easier to bear and fond memories will replace sorrow. And the relationship between the survivors, canine and human, may evolve into something even more beautiful as loving, grateful glances are shared between the two.